An Illustrated List of 5 Interesting Men I Encountered in the Last 24 Hours

Last night, a man engaged me in a pleasant conversation about how difficult it is these days to smoke weed in concert venues. He looked like this:


"STEVE VAI CAN PLAY SOME MEAN GUITAR," SAID THE MAN


This afternoon, I had an inspiring chat about the Oxford dictionary with a funny man from London, England. Although John works in Upper Canada College’s communications department, he’s the sort of guy who doesn’t like wearing ties and minding his Ps and Qs for the benefit of rich boys. I imagine this is how he looked when he was 12:


BOLLOCKS HARRY! I DON'T WANT TO REPAIR REPUTATIONS OF PRIVVY SCHOOLS!


On my way home, two young Mormons said, “hi how y’all doin’ today?” to me and another confused pedestrian as we all walked past the boarded-up houses. I’m like, no luck knocking on those doors huh boys? Maybe time to go back to Utah?


SAVING THE WORLD, ESPECIALLY THAT PESKY ST. JAMESTOWN


In my building, three black contractors with gold teeth talked to me in the elevator about the warm weather. We agreed we aught not complain as the frost is on its way. One of them resembled this fellow:


NEVA CUMPLAIN BOUT DA SUN


At home, I got a voice mail from a man I met randomly last week. I liked him but he seemed like the sort of guy who would be too busy sunbathing off the southern coast of St. Bart's with spider monkeys for the past two weeks, tripping on acid. Naturally, here’s what he looked like:


JULES GOTTA QUIT GOIN AFTER RICK SPRINGFIELD LOOKALIKES