A List of Things I Hate

- The name Cody
- Littering
- Parsnips
- Uggs
- The sound of sweaty flip flops
- Nokia tone
- Misspelling in signage
- People who stand left, despite the ‘walk left stand right’ signs
- Fergie of Black Eyed Peas
- Bra shopping
- Backwards baseball caps
- Single ply toilet paper
- In-grown hairs
- Lack of straws at the Artful Dodger
- The sound of someone shuffling in a plastic bag
- Abba
- Morning show hosts
- The woman who, during the intermission of a ballet, having eavesdropped on my conversation with Shaynna about how I’m writing a ‘Things I Hate’ list, turned around in her seat and suggested I write a ‘Things I Love’ list to balance my world view because she figured I needed advice from a bitch whose husband later asked why she was ‘talking to the lesbians in the seats behind us’, and who then produced 5 Ziploc bags of crunchy snacks to feed to her two fidgety kids while the husband fucked around on his Blackberry.

…and because the bitch has a point…

A List of Things I Love

- Random conversations with friendly strangers
- My parents
- Running into old friends on the street
- My beast, Purdy
- Music, loud and/or live
- Writing my blog/journals
- Making greeting cards with markers
- Singing Joni Mitchell songs in my apartment
- Walking fast down city streets
- My iPod
- My computer
- Sales at the Bay
- Cashmere sweaters
- Warm, pink, sunlight
- Lush forests
- Animals
- Beer, premium and imported
- Coffee in the morning
- All cheese
- All candy
- Crisp asparagus smothered in butter
- Eggplant tempura
- Sex romps
- Long sleeps
- My birthday
- Genuine compliments
- Sudden realizations such as: It’s beneficial to balance hate with love, even when the hate is more interesting and in keeping with one’s persona of being The Dark Girl with a pen like a dagger, writing a Hate List at the ballet of all places.